They may not always be tears of joy......

I don’t get tired of seeing adorable new babies.   How can you not melt when you see them stretch with their little fist of tiny fingers.  To ooh and aww as they pucker their lips. They sleep peacefully next to their mother. Yes for us it is a joy to welcome these new ones with a gift for their mother. Today Xenia told me how she was talking to a lady on the bus who said 40 years ago she was given some socks and a hat when in the hospital. She said he would never forget it. That it was so very special to her. While I compare how possibly this ministry may have the same effect on these mothers I am more hopeful that what they will take to heart is the message of love from our father And that one day  40 years from now someone may give a story  of how they came to know Christ through a simple gift given to them while in the hospital. But as we smile and enter the rooms we came across one who sat alone. There was no smile, no joy, a very curt “don’t give me one” left us to wonder if she was simply rejecting our gift or if there was more.  I left Hazel and Xenia to inquire her situation to be told exactly what I feared. She had lost her little baby. How heartbreaking. This very young mother sat in a room full of mothers with their babies forced to bear her pain no baby in her hands.  I can’t imagine the torture.  Please pray for this mother.  That is all that can be done.  She will have to be there 24 hours before being discharged. I have more to write but I will save it for another post. I wanted to bring light to this situation so you will be in prayer for her and all the other mothers here that deal with not only the loss of their baby, but the difficult task of having to spend recovery time surrounded by the babies of others. 

Coinsidences?

We are heavy into the rainy season now. Consider what hurricane rain is like and that is about what happens here most everyday in the later months of rainy season. One time it began to rain and didn't stop for two weeks. Today I awoke while it was so dark I assumed it had to still be night. It had rained clear into the morning. Just last week a tree fell close to our home from the weight of the rain. It is definitely something to behold to be able to look out and watch as road turns to river. The rain is especially fierce up on the mountain where I live.  Along with the heavy rain, thunder and lightning you can expect to frequently be without electricity. As such, I must confess that this is the second time I am writing this post, seeing as the first time as I was concluding it the power went out. Coincidence, carelessness, or divine intervention? Interesting enough I was writing precisely about the difference between coincidence and God's hand intervening in decisions that  we may feel we made on our own.  As a Christian how often are things just "coincidence"?  (I pause a moment to once again save what I have already written).  You see, this last trip I took to the hospital was planned and prepared with various things in mind. I decided the time and the day based on many factors. A; I wanted to go in the afternoon as opposed to the morning as I recalled that it is a calmer time and most of the women that get dismissed are done so at noon, assuring me that the women there would still have their overnight and baby bathing time still before them. As these kits are designed specifically for their time in the hospital I would like to be able to hand them out for the ladies both in labor, waiting to go into labor and the ones that gave birth recently. In the past I have never had enough to pass out to the ladies waiting which have averaged about 15-25. More on that later. B; I narrowed the days down to Wednesday or Thursday for specific reasons. Then I talked with the two ladies that would be accompanying me and finally settled on Thursday afternoon.  It was arranged for 1:30 after lunch..before visiting hours.....before the rain really starts in town.... We waited for 40 minutes before the lady who would take us up arrived. She was in a hurry since she feared the rain so we were a little rushed from room to room. I found myself a little disappointed and frustrated as it seemed that every time myself or Xenia and Hazel (my friends who accompanied me) tried to have a conversation we were cut short by our "guide" as she would hurry us out all the while glancing at our watch. I had to let go of that by remembering that, as I have said many times before, I feel the most important thing is just being able to get the packet in their hands and pray and trust that through the gesture and literature God will work according to His will. I prayed and searched a long time on the right kind of literature to put in the packet for this very reason and truly believe it is precisely what needs to be said. Hazel was instrumental in helping to translate and prepare the literature. I will share a few highlights of the trip. The first one being as we were dropping off the kits to the neonatal department, they come to the door and give us a count on how many are there and we hand them to the nurses as we cannot enter this area. As we were waiting, one of the cleaning ladies popped her head out from a closet and called Xenia over.  Right then the nurses came back and we got busy sorting out and passing them the kits so I was not able to ask till later what that was about. There were a total of 14 babies in neonatal  care this time. More than any other time I have gone. The mothers are usually with them. Back to the cleaning lady, she was asking if we would give her a kit for her daughter that was pregnant but not there yet. Of course she was obliged and the same happened later  in the next hall over when the cleaning ladies brought over one of the employees who was clearly pregnant, for us to give her one. They then joked around with us by puffing out their own stomachs saying they would like one too. We all had a good laugh. I have also had nurses tease saying "Oh I want one" as well.  There was one baby girl who was not in the neonatal but was absolutely tiny. She was asleep on the bed and had been born just a few hours prior. The mom was alone and told us she had nothing there for the baby including anything to carry her home in. I saw that she had received a kit with a blanket so I began to search for one that had a onesie to hand her as well. I had one kit that didn't have a water bottle in it and had put it on the bottom to not hand out since all the rest had water bottles. It just so happened this one was for a girl and had both a onesie and socks so I handed that to her. I had made two kits with a smaller hat and preemie diapers and it so happened that she had received one of those initially. This was neat for me because even though I would have switched her current one out with one of the smaller diapered ones I couldn't help but wonder and conclude that God had it so that it just happened to be the next kit out of the bag. This, not to keep us from having to search through our bags to find  the smaller one, but instead to show us He was right there with us.  It was also a great opportunity to point out how God cares for us in that this mom was supplied with her babies hospital needs at the precise time. I would calculate that it would have not been long till her baby needed that first diaper change. Coincidence? Overall we had a great trip and even though the months of September and October are the highest birth months we were able to give out kits to the mothers waiting to go into labor. I had been determined to have enough with me for that and to leave a few kits with the nurses to have on hand to give to the mothers, like the one mentioned above, who have nothing when they give birth. As it worked out I had six unisex and one girl kit left.  I left the six with the nurses as Xenia had asked me for a girl one for someone she knew. That worked out beautifully. Coincidence?  We left just as it began to rain to the dismay of our guide as her intent of rushing us was to get home before the rain began. But it worked out as we gave her a ride home and Xenia had an umbrella so no harm done.  I tend to write long posts far and in-between; for this I apologize but I leave you with this final story and the main reason for the subject matter of this post . "Coincidences?"  As we entered into one of the rooms I was greeted with a huge smile by one of the moms,  almost as if she knew me. The funny thing was she was strangely familiar to me as well. Then it hit me and almost simultaneously we said "I know you"! I had met her this past summer in one of the places we worked with our mission teams. She lives in the more impoverished area of this region and was pregnant with twins. At the time she had a few months to go and didn't know what she was having. I told her some of what to expect during her time in the hospital and gave her a couple kits to have whenever she ended up giving birth which was no time soon. So, you can imagine my surprise to find her there when she still had a couple more months to go. Not to mention the fact that she happened to be at her bed at that time and not in the neonatal care unit. She had given birth to a boy and a girl. I don't recall the girls name but the boys name was Brandon. He stood out to me as he was born with liquid on his brain.  Please keep him in your prayers. We were genuinely happy to see one another and I felt like this was just another watering of a seed that had been planted prior. Later I had to stop and take note of the various occurrences of the day.  Taking in account of all that had happened, everything from my own hand in planning the day the time, the quantity of kits...to what was "out of my hands", the delay, the rushing through the rooms, and realized that the chance happening of running into this lady precisely when she was at her bed, on that day, and at that exact time was not merely a "coincidence". Literally a few minutes earlier or later we could have missed her as I said earlier most of the time you spend in neonatal if your babies are there. And  as such I have to then deduce that in both the area that you have "control" of and those out of our "control" God indeed guides us. So this day was filled with many moments of whom many would say are just coincidences. I leave it for you to determine for yourself.  But as for me I believe God works mysteriously and you can see His hand in even the littlest things if you keep your eyes open. 

40 Dollars

When I first began talking about starting Chubby Cheeks I had a lady give me 40 dollars. It took a little while before I started to receive hats and items and of course I needed to buy the other things to put in the packets of items not donated. Whenever I needed to buy something I would say “I have 40 dollars”. It soon became a joke between my husband and I because in truth I had used that 40 dollars many times over.  However, a few weeks ago I knew I had a shipment of hats and blankets coming my way and I honestly did not have any more “40 dollars” to use to retrieve it. There is a flat cost of storage whether your shipment is one day or 7 in the warehouse once it reaches Costa Rica, after that the cost goes up. I received an email telling me that my items had been delayed due to circumstances out of their control at the port in Costa Rica. It took another week before it came in but in that time period I received a sizable donation from a group in Florida. The president and his wife had been here in March and were gracious enough to give some funding from their charitable donation fund of this particular group. You can imagine how pleased I was. With this I can pay taxes and shipping of the boxes that were on their way and of a future shipment that I knew was soon to be sent.  I can also purchase the items to go along with the hats and blankets that are given.  This will be most helpful.  Then there was another blessing. Two days ago I friend posted my link on her facebook page and through that someone gave another monetary donation. I want to make mention of this amount because of the lesson I was taught through it. I had been and am willing to give as many “40 dollars” as necessary.  My mother too had contributed to help. But the fact is that I knew that I would not always have the metaphorically speaking “40 dollars” to give and as much as I wanted to, I knew that if God wants this to happen He is the one I will have to rely and trust in. Whether I, or if one day someone in my place, can continue this on or whether God has it for a season only, I have to trust in Him alone.  God can speak to us in mysterious ways….Can you guess how much that donation was? I will give you 40 guesses.

The first visit

Wow what a summer!  I am so sorry for not updating, our summers are very busy and I also moved from our previous location to a home where the internet does not really work. I have so much to tell but I believe I will separate it into various post.  This first post will be strictly about our first visit. The first visit was overwhelming and exciting and not what I would have anticipated. All this time I was wanting to make sure I didn’t get in the way, to stay in the hospital staffs good graces etc, which is still my intent, but I was received with open arms. For this first visit there were two of us. I along with, Xenia who has been with me in the journey from the day I thought of this, as well as being a spiritual mother to me, and my kids Costa Rican “grandmother”.  We were waiting at reception to meet my contact, head of communications when in a moment she arrived with 6 other women with her. These ladies are hospital volunteers under a catholic covering. I think of them as little mother Teresa’s. They were all there and they took us as if we were quite important to the rooms while my communications contact snapped pictures here and there to use in the hospital newsletter.  We were in and out in a matter of an hour and had passed out about 40 kits.  After I got home I was able to truly process what had occurred. First, we were very well received. Second we were esteemed and put in a form of honor that I did not covet and I admit, found myself shrinking away from. I was actually embarrassed about the attention as my intent was and is to reach out to the women there, and not to exalt myself.  While I had anticipated making an announcement as I entered into each room explaining why we were there, I did not anticipate an audience with me; I admit I was intimidated. I was encouraged to speak louder and with confidence and Xenia later told me she was praying by my side the whole time. I was torn between not wanting to give off a “look at me I’m the American coming to bring you these things” but also wanting to comply with however the hospital would allow me to come and pass the kits out.  So as we made quick entries and exits to the corresponding areas I did not get to visit per say but I did get a few names and was able to say a few encouraging words.  The part that floored me was that while all along my intent was to be able to have access to visit the area where moms are settled with the babies, the very first place I was taken was to the recovery room followed by the labor room before ever visiting the area with newborns.  I had never dreamed of being able to go into those areas. I will post more on that later but with the exception of one of the future visits due to a strike going on that day, I have been able to continue going into the labor and recovery hall.  You will later read that for future visits we are able to stay and visit in each room and the cameras are no longer there and we don’t have the entire group of volunteer ladies with us so the attention is on the women in the hospital beds and not on me, but God did teach me to not shrink away when he is being uplifted even if it is through me. That in the end he is the one being Glorified ,not me, so stop trying to hide when and if any future “cameras” come out in my life but instead be bold proclaiming God’s glory.  I have however put away my sunglasses..ha! A smile and a friendly word are more powerful than any key to any door you are wanting to open.  Please read the next post which goes into more detail about other visits.

 

An overview of the hospital visits

I have been told by the hospital not to post pictures on a website of any babies or mothers. This for legal purposes so I am sorry to say that I cannot show you pictures. These pictures I am posting are of the teams that I took into the hospital.  I very much enjoyed bringing these ladies to the hospital. They took the time to hold the babies and the mothers were very receptive. I have had some good conversations with many of the women.  I have met women that have come in from 2 hours away close to the Nicaraguan border.  So far there have been two sets of adorable twins. We were able to pray with one mother whose baby had been born with their liver outside of their body and they were at another hospital but the mom had to stay till her time was up. I can’t imagine being surrounded by other babies while my own baby’s life was in jeopardy. Each time we have given the nurses packets for the babies in neonatal care. One time there were as many as 12 there.  I have been made aware that if a mother loses her child she too will remain with the other mothers till her recovery time. I have not encountered any such mother but with this new information I plan on making up and having on a hand a packet that would be designed specifically for mom with a different message to help her with the grief. As I stated in my earlier post I am allowed to enter into the area where moms are in active labor and into the recovery room where they stay for an hour before they are moved to the main hall.  I admit that this brought up some traumatic memories for me, as I had a very difficult time during my daughter’s birth, but it also helps me to remember so that I can be sensitive to what is going on. There is no pain medication and you are together in common rooms. I try to be quick and just give a smile a quick explanation to the mom or to the person with her if she has someone with her, a reassuring word that It will be over soon, and God bless them. I will tell you about one mom that had multiple staff around her, the curtains had been drawn and it was evident that she was moments from giving birth. I told the staff behind the desk if I could just leave the kit there with them for of course obvious reasons… I had to laugh later when I thought of how the head nurse so sweet and enthusiastically said oh no go give it to her, it will cheer her up.  So I ventured through the curtains praying to God that I wouldn’t faint from “sympathy pains” and with the knowledge that there wasn’t anything I could hand her that would “cheer her up”.  Thankfully I got out of there in one piece and without seeing a birth which if you know me; you would know that would not be the best situation as I freak out at even the sight of any blood.  It was hard enough being shown my own placenta and educated about it much less someone else’s. I get off track. Back to babies, I have seen a couple of chubby big babies but for the most part they are so little and every one of them with a head full of dark hair. I was reminded of watching the mom across from me brushing her babies hair for the longest time as I sat holding my bald baby girl.  A year later and my baby girl does not have much more hair than some of these babies are born with.  I am pleased to say that the hospital now allows for the women to have someone with them at all times if they choose. I have been very pleased with how receptive and appreciative the men that are there have been. I have had some good conversations with them.  This being said, even with this change the majority of mothers are still alone. I realize this is due to many reasons, one being that there just isn’t someone available to accompany them, another that they came from afar. Whatever the reason it is still a very difficult time of recovery to be there taking full charge of your baby.  It is also very common to have surgery to tie your tubes before leaving the hospital.  For those that are having this done, they must not eat or drink till the procedure which is usually the next day.  I remember one mom looking longingly towards the water bottles telling me how thirsty she was.  I said we will leave it here so that you can have it as soon as you are done.  I have had some conversations about why these moms choose to have a surgery right after birth and as suspected the reasons being that there is not a “recovery” time for these moms after leaving the hospital and it is very likely they will be pregnant again very soon. For this reason they opt to go ahead and have it done before even leaving if their intent is to not have any more children. One of the mothers in my room who was having it done was only 19 and had given birth to her second child. So far each trip has been very good. I have made good contacts with the staff and volunteers ladies. One thing about Latin culture is that things are run very much on a relationship basis so you must take the time to cultivate those to be able to accomplish what you are trying to do. The gruff guard now smiles at me when we pass by, the head nurse has asked me to leave her kits to have on hand so she can give them to the most needy when necessary, the guy who comes in to register the babies has been all smiles when we have been there, the leader of the volunteer ladies asked me to give them a course one day on soap making. One of the things they do is take care of giving toiletries to the patients that need it. They also rely on donations so to help stretch that and also due to the benefits of homemade soap they would like to start making it and giving that out instead of buying it.  I would never have foreseen that in my future, but life is full of unexpected adventures. I am grateful. I realize this post has been a hodgepodge of information all at once. I have never been good at keeping with just one specific topic. But I hope you have seen some of this through my eyes and will continue to pray as this journey continues.

Getting to visit the pedeatric floor

Something very neat happened on two of our visits with the teams I took in. I had carried some extra larger hats and literature with me since on my first trip I was asked if I wanted to check to see if there were any babies in pediatrics. So I wanted to be prepared to give a little hat if there were. There was one 6 month old baby girl, whose mother was working with a social worker. She came from an area that is very impoverished and to look at her you knew she had/has a very rough life. They did not know what was wrong with the baby. I was asked by the volunteer ladies if I had any other supplies available that I could give her and I made arrangement to bring her a bag of supplies when we returned a couple days later. As we were arranging this it occurred to me to ask that if upon our return we could also bring some coloring books and crayons that the team had brought with them to give out to the children there.  We were told yes and when we came back we gave them a zip lock bag with a coloring book about Jesus and a tract and crayons. We were able to come in again with the following team, This time giving out a toy. This was wonderful to see God open doors for the right time. I especially enjoyed seeing a little 2 or 3 year old who was lying in her crib roll over and get up to reach for the big lighted bouncy ball.  We thought she was turning away from it when in fact she was just trying to get up to get it. So cute.

Picture of final product

With the help of all my boys and attempted help from my baby girl, we got our first packages made. I have also made a page on the tabs above of pictures of the whole process if you would like to see more.